Super MAD right now!!

[BJs4SJ]

Can anyone relate?  A massage trade was arranged between a friend and I.  She is a student still,  and I have been around awhile.  Anyway, I honored the appointment she made with me, just like I would any client.  She cancelled my appointment I had with her on Thursday (with a lame excuse) and we rescheduled for today at 1:30pm.  She did not show up.  Nor has she even called. I called her house and her kid said she went shopping!  I am totally pissed right now.  This person is a grown adult in her mid 30's.  I wouldn't be surprised by this behavior if the person was still a teen, but this woman wants to come and work in my office when she graduates.  I don't think so!  I made it in this business because of my exceptional work ethics.  Am I wrong to be so pissed off?  I am so mad, I want to send her a bill for the massage I gave her!!

 

[gildersleeve]

Super MAD right now!!

If the kid tells the truth,  you have a right to be annoyed.  At least you are getting a good idea how she does her business ahead of time.  Then again,  maybe she went shopping really really really early this morning and something has happened to her since then.... and her son go the times wrong... could be.  You know how kids can say the darndest things.  Just to be on the safe side, you might want to ask her -- before letting her see you in "rare form".       Good luck!````````````````I am the first to answer... oooh, I feel like Dear Abby!

 

[HFN]

GGGGGGGGGGrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.This is when I want to cringe as my instructors warnings of the Dual Relationship come back to haunt me.Hate to say it but it is the friendship.I thought, no, my friends won't try to take advaneforum.xxxe.Yes, they do.We all do.  I would get in toucvh with her to make sure she is ok.  Then I would GENTLY educate her in the ways of our business.  Let her know that if she does this in her practice she will lose money!Your time has to be valued.  Hopefully she will learn from this.Good luck,Robyn

 

[WTFYW?LDG!]

Super MAD right now!!

I can totally relate because another MT did the same to me. I gave her a massage but had such a hard time scheduling mine. At the last minute she would call and cancel with some lame reason why she couldn't do it. I never did get that massage. I chalked it up to learning a big lesson.I would make sure that everything is okay with her. But if you find out she really was shopping and blew you off.....I would have a little "chat" with her. And I would rethink whether you want this person in your practice or not. Try to talk to her sooner then later....or else you'll never do it.

 

[Brendon]

I can sympathize with you and realize your frustration.  But I would talk to her.  Sometimes, when your'e a student you don't look at things in the same way.  Or if she has children and going to school......she could've just been busy and forgotten.  But I would be very sure before inviting her to join my business.  Talk to her professionally and let her know it makes you upset that you gave your time to give her a massage and was really looking forward to some body work for yourself that day and was dissappointed.  Give her the benefit of the doubt, I always say....just twice.  Then it's time to pull out the glove....no, just kidding.  But I would let her know that you can't do this in business and expect to have clientele.  

 

[MELINDA B]

I can understand the anger and frustration.  Tough talk to have to have with a friend, but needed since she intends to work in your office.  Of course find out her reason for no showing or not even calling you.  She just cost you three appts where you could have had a paying client.  Not knowing what you charge but if its $50 per session she has personally cost you $150 in potential income.  When you talk to her, and you have to, I would include this in your discussion.  Not to mention your now leary of referring any work to her because she has shown you she can't be relied on.  Which also carries over to you being associated business wise since if she doesn't live up to her agreements and obligations or will "no show" on clients it will have a direct negative effect on your business as a whole.  

 

[Aamir Zaka Buttar]

Thanks everyone for you input.  I called her yesterday and she was whispering on the phone, "I can't tell you right now, because there are other people here".  I asked if she was okay, and she said yes.  But for some reason I think she's full of it.  I should have known by her lazy attitude about school and the whole working thing.  She has been a stay-at-home mom for sometime, her house always looks like a pig stye, like really gross.  I think she's just plain lazy.  Yes, she's a friend, but not what I would qualify as a special friend.  She wants to come and work in my office, but that's not going to happen.  I worked too hard and long to put myself where I am, and I am not going to let one lazy person ruin it.  Sorry to sound so harsh, but I didn't believe her on the phone and chances are she was at Target shopping, just like her kid said.  I guess I should not assume people are gonna have the same work ethics I do.

 

[x_x]

Super MAD right now!!

Better to learn now than later!

 

[Amanda & Jess S]

Super MAD right now!!

Better to learn now than later!

Exactly...Now you don't have to go through having to find out how unreliable she is while she is working with you and potentially costing you clients.

You might have lost time and potential paying appointments but reputation is priceless.

 

[Sindhu]

I agree with LadySinatra!  I think this is a, comparatively speaking, small price to pay to avoid a big mistake later.  I also hate it when someone disrespects my time.    I gave a friend who had a reliability problem a small chance (rent my room for one/hr week).  It was a really good opportunity to get her foot in the door. She couldn't handle it.  I told her she could not work out of my office. She needed something more casual.  Surprisingly, she understood and said it was expected.  No longer having to constantly check up on her, I felt a huge burden had been lifted from me.