Chat YMMV TIPS & SUGGESTIONS

[krayjee]

We all have different sizes and shapes. There's no quick fix for that but you can improve your YMMV factor by being kind, generous and keeping good hygiene.
I hang out in ladies lounge room with girls lots of time and I can hear all kinds of comments from girls as soon as they saw the guy in the CCTV monitor. They have nick names for a few guys such as....cheap guy, smelly mouth guy, smelly guy, blue cheese guy, nice guy , good tip guy and such.

The most stupid guys are those who tried to haggle to save 10 -20 dollars and make themselves look cheap. They killed the mood of the girls by doing so. Once the girls see you as a cheap guy, the chance of getting a good time and good service is gone. All they will get is the mediocre service.

 

[Bustanut]

We all have different sizes and shapes. There's no quick fix for that but you can improve your YMMV factor by being kind, generous and keeping good hygiene.
I hang out in ladies lounge room with girls lots of time and I can hear all kinds of comments from girls as soon as they saw the guy in the CCTV monitor. They have nick names for a few guys such as....cheap guy, smelly mouth guy, smelly guy, blue cheese guy, nice guy , good tip guy and such.

Totally agree. The aka’s are Fkn jokes. I think the funniest one I heard was bum bum smell guy lolololol. Guys, clean your ass pls lol.

 

[pineapplebun]

Totally agree. The aka’s are Fkn jokes. I think the funniest one I heard was bum bum smell guy lolololol. Guys, clean your ass pls lol.

on that note, i am glad i don't know chinese so i don't have a clue what they are calling me.....

 

[JackPhilip]

YMMV

Alright so there's been a lot of banter lately about YMMV. So i figured why not make a post. Some people get a lot, some people get next to nothing. Here's my tips over the years that have got me extra mileage. A lot of which I did not ask for as it happened organically. Either by me going in instigating the action or the mpa just doing it.

1) BE IN SHAPE

Guys, there's no excuse for being fat and out of shape. I've said this a million times on here. Being in great shape gets you extra play all day everyday. I would go as far to say that 90% of the time an mpa is shocked when my shirt comes off. It's like she's never seen a well sculpted body before. I'm talking eyes popping out of her head. This tells me that the majority of the guys going into spas are not in shape. I'm a little older now but i train a lot. It's part of my daily regime. It should part of yours too, not just for this hobby but for life in general. If you guys lack motivation, or need an extra push. Workout with a friend or hire a trainer. I've always been a gym rat since i was young. In my case now, i have this young lad who works for me. He is in insane shape as he workouts like crazy. We train together and push each other every time at the gym.

Let's be honest, no guy wants a fat lard ass mpa. In retrospect no mpa wants a fat lard ass mandem. That's just fkn gross all around. There's a lot of things we can't control, like our height, aging etc but you can control your weight. Having a fit body is the ultimate sign of self respect.

2) HYGIENE

Yes, fkn hygiene. When you guys go to a spa, shower right before you go. I'm talking right before, like shower and head straight to the spa right after. I don't like to shower at spas before a session. The reason for this is that, I don't like their cheap ass soap. A lot of the spas don't even have body lotion for crying out loud. So i use the quality stuff i have at home before i head out. I only shower after sessions at the spa and even then the idea of how many people being in there just fkn grosses me the fk out.

Brush your mother fkn teeth before a session. Holy fk, i can't even believe i have to say this one. You know how many girls i've spoken to over the years who have said so many guys they see have bad breath. Brush, , use mouth wash and chew a piece of gum on your way to the spa. I don't recommend flossing for those of you who like to go down on a chick for obvious reasons.

Spray a good cologne. None of this shoppers drug mart cheap ass shit. The good shit. This hobby is expensive so invest in a good cologne. I like creed aventus, baccarat rouge 540, and le labo te matcha just to name a few. Don't fkn over spray, two or three sprays max.

Groom yourself. If you're a hairy ass chewbacca mother fker get the manscape trimmer and get to work. You don't have to go zero guard. For those of you who have small dicks leave enough hair so your dick seems bigger. LOL!!!... but don't leave too much where the mpa has to go searching for moby.

For those of you who have been blessed with the monster anaconda a light trim will do.

Come well put together. I'm not saying shirt and tie type of shit. I'm just saying don't look fkn sloppy. The girls don't look sloppy so neither should you.

Most of these girls if not all ,are super clean and ready to go. You owe to them and yourself to be just as clean.

3) BE POLITE

I know these girls are sex workers and its easy to look at them like fkn hoes and treat them like one. If you want the gfe experience then treat them like one in the room. What i mean by this is be nice. Lead with your body slow and sensually. Build up to the experience you want. In a car you don't skp from 1st gear to 5th. So same applies here. If you go too fast and the mpa pulls back take it down a notch. You want the mpa to be comfortable with you. Build rapport with the mpa. The more comfortable she is with you, the more she will do.

4) TIP WELL

If the service is good tip well. If the session was basic then give the standard. Some of you guys are so fkn cheap. I'm not saying tip a ton, though some guys do. You'll' be surprised how much an extra 5,10 or 20 goes on top of market rate. This goes a long way and the girl will remember that on your next visit.

I remember one chick i got a bs from. I had 4 twenties and a 5 in my wallet. I figured wth might as well just give it to her. I gave it to her and her smile lit up like crazy. Like she was so fkn happy over 5 Fkn bucks. It felt good to do that gesture and see her reaction. Totally worth the 5 bucks.

5) GO EARLY

If your schedule allows, you go fkn early. The mpas have more energy for a better massage and are more enthusiastic earlier in the day. Avoid going at late hours if you can because near the end of the day they are just tired and waiting to go home.

One time i went to a spa at 7:30 to check one of the girls on my rotation. Yo she was tired AF!!!! She literally went through 11 guys. She kept yawning and her massage was lacking serious power. It was pure shiatsu soft bullshit. I came for deep tissue bitch..lol. Anyway I cut the bullshit massage short , we ended up naked, cuddling and making out. After 15 mins she passed out ...LOLOLOLOL! Dumb bitch..kidding!! She was exhausted. I mean i can't complain as it was serious dfk but i came for the massage. She said i didn't have to tip her. I still tried to give her $50 bucks for the half hour but she refused and said next time. I went to the boss after and told her i don't think it’s a good idea for these chicks to see that many guys. The boss bitch said sorry and gave me an extra bottle of water. .Like what the fk am i gonna do with 2 bottles of water bitch LOL!!!

The service just lacks after a certain number of guys the mpa goes through. I mean imagine an mpa wacking off 11 fkn dicks...wtf!!! Go early!!!

5) DO YOUR RESEARCH

There's a lot of information out there on who provides what. A lot of you guys may be looking for a great massage, a great tease, a fantastic body slide etc. Do the research and ask credible sources, watch out for the shills though. There's a ton of them on here.

If anyone would like to add suggestions or have stories to add regarding mileage pls reply. I would love to hear them.

Great tips and well thought out! Being respectful, clean, and prepared definitely makes a huge difference in the experience. Couldn’t agree more about going early—energy levels matter! Appreciate you sharing this, it’s super helpful for both newcomers and seasoned hobbyists.

 

[pineapplebun]

Couldn’t agree more about going early—energy levels matter!

so making an appointment right before closing time is a bad idea...? fml.

 

[William tell]

We all have different sizes and shapes. There's no quick fix for that but you can improve your YMMV factor by being kind, generous and keeping good hygiene.
I hang out in ladies lounge room with girls lots of time and I can hear all kinds of comments from girls as soon as they saw the guy in the CCTV monitor. They have nick names for a few guys such as....cheap guy, smelly mouth guy, smelly guy, blue cheese guy, nice guy , good tip guy and such.

I think they have nicknames for most regulars. I know what my nickname is and I think it is funny.

 

[Bustanut]

Great tips and well thought out! Being respectful, clean, and prepared definitely makes a huge difference in the experience. Couldn’t agree more about going early—energy levels matter! Appreciate you sharing this, it’s super helpful for both newcomers and seasoned hobbyists.

Respect bro, I always win with early sessions. I hate knowing the girl I want wacked off how many other guys and did lord knows what with them ????LOLOLOL

 

[Bustanut]

so making an appointment right before closing time is a bad idea...? fml.

Kj says he likes the last deal of the day, me personally I found much success going early.

 

[pineapplebun]

I

Kj says he likes the last deal of the day, me personally I found much success going early.

I just looked. It’s her last shift of her week before she takes a few days off. I hope her schedule wasn’t super busy the last few days.

 

[startbeforeIfinish]

Totally agree. The aka’s are Fkn jokes. I think the funniest one I heard was bum bum smell guy lolololol. Guys, clean your ass pls lol.

i even put cologne down there and it is much appreciated from what I can tell.

 

[Bustanut]

I

I just looked. It’s her last shift of her week before she takes a few days off. I hope her schedule wasn’t super busy the last few days.

Get that in brother

 

[Bustanut]

i even put cologne down there and it is much appreciated from what I can tell.

Really eh? I’ll have to give that one a go. Ass crack, balls or both?

 

[startbeforeIfinish]

Really eh? I’ll have to give that one a go. Ass crack, balls or both?

Both, I use Alfred Sung Homme they all seem to love that. On my second bottle.

 

[tr0mb0]

Bro, that’s exactly what I’m talking about hahaha. It’s just female nature they can’t be one up’d by their ops. Lol it’s a great play for extra mileage, if you know how to play it correctly. Well played, kudos brother

It feels like I earned that hot rival sex, you know what I’m saying? I always carefully flirted with her, keep her hopes up! That part is almost as good as the sex.

 

[Bustanut]

Both, I use Alfred Sung Homme they all seem to love that. On my second bottle.

Ok I use te matcha from le labo. I’ll give those areas a spray or two and see what the ladies think lol. Respect for the tip.

 

[Bustanut]

It feels like I earned that hot rival sex, you know what I’m saying? I always carefully flirted with her, keep her hopes up! That part is almost as good as the sex.

oh i definitely know what you’re saying brother. Keep their hopes high is part of the game. With the rivals as you say sometimes, i tell the chick I’ll see her next time but I go back to the other lol to spite her even more. The mental warfare is real lol.

 

[pineapplebun]

Do you think we might get better service if we suggest women try this workout?

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[MyOnlyTime]

Do you think we might get better service if we suggest women try this workout?

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Spa girls that are good at bjs rarely have a double chin, it’s true.

 

[pineapplebun]

Ok. Another YMMV tip for you guys… don’t eat smoked salmon for lunch before going to a spa

 

[Bustanut]

Ok. Another YMMV tip for you guys… don’t eat smoked salmon for lunch before going to a spa

Hahahhahahahhahabahhahah lolol